In searching the internet on this topic, I came across a fascinating TED talk by Sheena Iyengar, called "The Art of Choosing", which addressed this topic perfectly:
Ms. Iyengar made the point that I had pondered for a while, how comfortable we are with a) making choices and b) what we define as being a "true" choice. To most of us, having a choice is an extension of our identity, it defines our own will and ability to distinguish between at least two options, ultimately determining which one is the most beneficial one for us. That said, it is necessary to assume that we are all equally able to weigh the pros and cons of options on our own, without much outside pressure.
As we think about this in a cultural context, it is important to remember that having choices is equal to a degree of freedom and individuality that not all countries/cultures share equally. Therefore, some cultures are more comfortable with giving and making choices, whereas other countries/cultures are more comfortable with a higher authority to take on the decision making process. What I found interesting in the TED talk above, was that choice can be believed to be beneficial for a large number of people, therefore raising the bar for everyone versus other choices being only beneficial to one person or a small group of people.
How does the comfort level of having to make choices translate into real life scenarios? I certainly had my own experiences over the years from too much choice to hardly any at all:
I remember the first time I went to an American supermarket to buy yogurt, an item which I always thought of being a fairly basic and simple food staple back in Germany. I was overwhelmed by the choices of yogurt in the dairy section: non-fat, low-fat, whole milk, pre-stirred, fruit at the bottom, fruit at the top, brand name, store brand, yogurt on sale, etc. It was almost too much to take in, because I had never realized that there could be potentially so many different types of yogurt - truly experiencing "die Qual der Wahl". I wondered whether I had lived a life of deprivation, never having to make this kind of choice before ...
In American restaurants I would desperately try to remember the variety of salad dressings that the staff would recite in a friendly way when taking the order. I was afraid that I would have to ask again, if I did not understand all choices. After a few of these incidences, I had decided that I would limit my possible choices to "French dressing", so I did not have to go through that torture every time, but rather let the waiter/waitress know exactly what dressing I wanted.
Now, considering the other end of the spectrum, how about not having a choice. Again, let me take food as an example. I do remember two incidents, where having a choice was not an option, and yet people accepted it, since that is what THEY were used to all their life. When I was 14 years old, my family visited our relatives in the former East Germany. My aunt wanted to prepare breakfast, and asked me and my cousin to go down to the store in their apartment building complex and "see what they have". Upon entering the well-sized supermarket, I realized that most of the shelves were totally empty. Not much to buy that day. So instead of being able to prepare a special breakfast for their "Western" relatives, we all made do with what they had at home. No complaints, no whining, just accepting it.
Years later, my husband and I lived in Ukraine, 8 years after the fall of the Soviet Union. Albeit living in the country's capital and being far better off than the average Ukrainian, we realized in the winter, that the bazaars had very limited foods to offer, basically only winter produce, such as potatoes, onions, beets and cabbage. Not being able to eat lettuce for 6 months, we made salad out of cabbage and enjoyed our canned fruits and vegetables that we had shipped along with our other belongings.
During our time in Ukraine, my husband and I had the privilege to serve as election monitors in a small town bordering on Rumania. After a grueling 24 hour train ride, we arrived at our hotel fittingly called "Drushba" ("Friendship"). We assumed to be the only guests in the concrete building, since we never saw or heard anyone else except for the few hotel staff members, that seemed to be somewhat bored due to the lack of guests. The lobby's lights were turned on and off only when we crossed the entrance area. Hoping to find something warm to eat after only nibbling on sandwiches on the train, we went to the hotel's restaurant. The waiter was very polite, gave us the menu and said " We don't have anything on here". We had learned to ask, "What do you have today?" The waiter ensured us that they had the freshest ingredients to make an omelette according to our wishes. We chose from tomatoes, mushrooms, onions, cheese and ham - it was one of the best omelettes we have ever had.
In Western cultures, we parent by giving our children (preapproved, acceptable) choices, in return making the child feel self-empowered and self-aware of their own dreams, wishes, goals. In other cultures, parenting is very hierarchical, with the child having to accept choices that their parents already made for them, which can include school, extracurricular activities, university degree, career path, arranged marriages. It seems right to them, and unacceptable to us. We tend to reward independent thinking and strong decision making skills.
Each system has its own strengths and weaknesses, and keeps itself in balance through making choice (or lack thereof) a cultural value. If this value never gets challenged, it remains in place and attains a certain amount of comfort level. Global expansion, increased travel and opportunities to live in foreign countries, allow us to hold a mirror in front of our cultural values and compare it with those of other people. The challenge goes both ways: the lack of choice can feel infantile, limiting, and authoritarian, whereas a wealth of choices can feel overpowering, confusing, unnecessary and risky. When we make a choice, we take a risk. We assume that by having considered all other options, the one we choose, is the right one. So, we therefore think of ourselves as informed and intelligent human beings. The flip side to that way of thinking would be: we don't have all the information, experience and wisdom to make our choices, and trust someone else to make the decision for us, thus trusting another entity more than ourselves.
When the Berlin wall opened and the Soviet Union eventually fell, millions of people had to learn to make choices for themselves. They found themselves paralyzed by the many opportunities that suddenly existed, and unfortunately many companies took advantage of these political and economic growing pains by exploiting the inexperience that these people had with making choices. They truly did experience "Die Qual der Wahl", whether it would be opening a bank account, buying competitively priced bank, booking vacations, buying cars, staying in the "East" or moving to the "West", etc.
One young Ukrainian man, whose family had made it their duty to teach my husband and myself everything there was to learn about their country and culture, came to us and asked for advice on job applications. His university hosted a job fair, where local and foreign companies interested in hiring local employees set up their exhibits. We advised him on how to write his resume and "market his skills and experience". The idea of having to "sell" himself scared him, he was used to being assigned a job in a factory after graduation. No career choice, no torture, just a plan for him. This wide open land of new opportunities was outside his and many other's comfort zone.
In the research studies undertaken by Sheena Iyengar and presented in the TED talk above, another interesting observation was made: some choices are not viewed as actual choices. Sheena Iyengar used the example of offering different sodas, which to her were different kinds of drinks (Cola, Sprite, Mountain Dew, etc.) but to the group she interviewed, it was no choice, it was just soda. True choices would have been for example soda, tea, coffee, water, etc. So, how different do the properties or characteristics of a choice have to be, in order to qualify for being a genuine option? Apparently, very different!
Every day, we make hundreds of choices. Given more variety, one would assume that making a choice would then become more difficult, since we have to weigh more options. What would happen if we decide that to offer fewer choices, therefore easing the pain of decision making? Would less variety lead to fewer choices and ultimately to a decreased individuality? Living in a culture where the individual is standing in the foreground, I think it would.
Learning to understand other cultures and political systems is vital to these questions. In a very hierarchical society, the decision making process occurs from the top down. So it is natural for people to think that someone above them will make the choice for them. In cultures where the good of the community stands in the foreground, rather than the individual, the group mentality almost automatically demands fewer choices. The risk starts where political systems limit choices of the individual to the point that it leads to infantilization of a country's population.
I believe we are responsible for our own choices and consequences thereof, so we should also be responsible for limiting ourselves. I have decided that some choices are unnecessary for me, and I will put these painful struggles to rest once and for all, such as beverage choices at coffee house establishments. After considering the endless possibilities for ordering that perfect cup of Joe (after successfully accomplishing the first hurdle of basic choice No. 1 "caffeinated or decaffeinated" and the second hurdle of basic choice "small, medium or large"), I CHOOSE to settle for "coffee of the day" from now on. No more torture for me anymore at the coffee shop and in the dairy aisle!
